So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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