I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
