You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
