last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
do nipples grow back?
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