so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
do herpes really smell.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
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