Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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