brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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