why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
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Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
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She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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