Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
