i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
