Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
