i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
