Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
