You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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