Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize