the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
