I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
