he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
