how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I just cut my nipple shaving
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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