i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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