I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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