how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
