i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!