I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
