it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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