WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
