But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Someone signed my nipple.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
