at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
So much Jack, so little girl.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize