Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize