'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you win again, gameday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I AM VODKA MAN
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
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