Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
My ass is underappreciated
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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