If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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