its not stalking. its research.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
