After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i think i have two assholes
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
