i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
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it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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