i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....