I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
