I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.