it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize