The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
