we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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