I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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