oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
