So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
