Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
well you can't waste a boner
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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