Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
