Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
