either way he was missing a nipple.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just forgot I was standing up.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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