i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
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I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
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That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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