So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I take back everything I said about communal showers
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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