Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
